3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
