we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
