Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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