the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
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