apparently the secret to your success is patron
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
