rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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