Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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