dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
