I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
