I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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