So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
