she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
