i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
