"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
