He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
