That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
