lets start a swedish sibling band together
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
