chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
