a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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