hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
he fucked my hip out of place.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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