just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
