People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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