R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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