Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
