It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize