listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I think a kid would responsible me up
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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