these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
just tell him i said nine months
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
