How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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