I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
