wakey wakey hands off snakey
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
