Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
