I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize