People in love make me want to vomit
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
