I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize