We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
