Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
i think my cat just said my name.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize