you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
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