I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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