Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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