maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
