this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
She even gives head with a lisp.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
