talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Randomize
