Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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