dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
