Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
