Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
