I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize