she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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