Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
