Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
