Where is the hickey?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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